sometimes i feel 70% of what we talk constitutes backbiting…at times it feels inevitable, for lubricating & accelerating the pace of conversation…we laugh at backbitee’s accent, fashion sense, physique, habits, preferences, relatives, social staus, job, salary, car, complexion etc etc…and if someone warns us not to commit gheebat, we counter it with,”so what? i can say this to his face!!”..
this, people, is a very popular misunderstanding….the definition of gheebat as peeth pechay burayi is not proper & comprehensive..it probably resulted from the urdu translation of its english name, BACKbiting…admittedly which it is, most of the time as most humans are risk-averse, non-confrontation type creatures who like to play it safe, and wait for the person to be absent before launching into their version of his/her characteristics…
so, if it isnt just disparagement in absentia, what is it?
Prophet Muhammad said :”Do you know what backbiting is?” They said, “God and His Messenger know best.” He then said, “It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike.” Someone asked him, “But what if what I say is true?” The Messenger of God said, “If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him.” (Muslim)
see?its not about our guts..whether we say horrible things to someone’s face or behind his back, in both cases we are guilty of backbiting..
so, err, avoid backbiting…
and that means you are not allowed to say that i am a lousy preacher 😉